One of the hardest things in my life I have ever done was become an artist. Like so many people, I had serious doubts. I saw my life hadn’t been one of any particular struggle. I believed great art had to come out of monumental struggle. A place of deep anguish.
Nothing particularly traumatic ever occurred in my life. Finally, I just decided that even though my life wasn’t filled with huge amounts of pain, there was plenty- it was filled with that I wanted to express. I chose painting and actually writing to do this. I am still figuring it out.
Over time I was able to slowly build up the self-confidence to put my art out in the world. And of course your art is actually you. This is why it is so scary.
Our biggest fear is that we will be criticized. Someone we don’t know or even worse, someone we actually care about, will tell us what we are making is not adequate. It doesn’t measure up and as a result of our efforts we somehow are less.
When this occurs it can rupture the relatively thin filament of self-confidence we as artists have so slowly and tenderly built up within ourselves.
Usually those people who put you down are not artists and therefore their words, at least for me, are not so much of a concern. Those who have even a tiny inkling how fraught the creative process is with insecurity and self-doubt rarely feel the need to make the situation worse for someone.
But when it happens, and it will, don’t let it. Don’t give it too much attention. Somewhere I heard the saying “Don’t let it rent space in your brain” which I love.
Hear it, consider it, look for a morsel of learning if there, and then step away.
Let it go and move only towards the people and things that bring you alive.
And never, never look back.
22 Comments
Hi! I’m
Nicholas Wilton
the founder of Art2Life.
With over 20 years experience as a working artist and educator, I’ve developed a systematic approach that brings authenticity, spontaneity and joy back into the creative process.
Join me and artists from all over the world in our Free Art2Life Artists Facebook Group or learn more here about Art2Life.
What feels harder than making art? For me? Almost everything. I love creating, whether with paint, pencil, words, or beads. But being an artist? That’s another story. In all the years I’ve been creating art, I generally give it away. I’ve had one commission for 100.00 years ago to do a portrait of children who had died as infants. That was it. I’m terrified of going professional and actually trying to use my art for income, be it my art with words or with fine art or with jewelry.
Whether you sale your art or give it away it doesn’t make you any less an artist. ox
Traci, that is brilliant.
Such good advise, but not always easy. A friend was looking at a few paintings at my home, and complemented 2 or 3 of them and to one she pointed and said “that’s garbage”! I was shocked and speechless. It’s hard to move on from that, but we have to. Later she claimed she didn’t think it was mine. I keep painting with joy. And thank you so much for your generous blogs. Each day I look forward to reading them and learning just a bit more about myself.
I can relate to this story:) I am a folk artist and I remember when I brought in a painting that I did for my sister’s birthday to show my coworkers. The theme was butterflies. In all honesty I thought it was just lovely and I was so proud of it. It was on my desk and one of my coworkers came in and said, “oh that’s cute who made it?” I said, “I did.” She replied, “Oh how sweet, you kept and framed your childhood art. How old were you when you made this?” I looked up at her proudly and said, “Thirty-Three.” 🙂 hahahaha
As an artist of over 40 years standing, I certainly relate to your essay. For me it doesn’t get any easier, if anything, it gets harder, partly because the art has brought me to deeper parts of myself that I am reluctant to “put out there”. It’s not only that the process is scary, keeping the reins on your horses as they move forward, but it’s also a life of solitude, even tho’ you might find people who like what you do and indeed, encourage you. But the act of each day’s creating is being alone, with oneself. That’s scary and why all sorts of delaying tacticts become part of the day’s work! 😉
“Beethoven said that it’s better to hit the wrong note confidently, than hit the right note unconfidently. Never be afraid to be wrong or to embarrass yourself; we are all students in this life, and there is always something more to learn.”
― Mike Norton
I remember the first time I sold my paintings at an outdoor show. I was so nervous. These paintings came straight from my heart and I was so unsure that people would relate to them. I was very comfortable selling my photographs, but putting my paintings up with a price tag for all to see was scary. But I did it anyway. And guess what? I sold out! Two men from Belgium came into my tent and bought my entiire collection! It truly took my breath away. I also remember the first time I said out loud that I was an artist. It felt so freeing. How it actually happened wasn’t that direct thou. Someone asked me what I did for a living. I said, “I work for (company) as a Sales/Marketing Director, but I am actually an artist by nature. As soon as I said, I am an artist by nature, a bolt of adrenaline shot through my veins. It was as if I said the magic words that opened the gate! Now that is my tag line on my business card. There’s my name and then underneath my name it says “artist by nature.” I am still doing sales as my main job that pays the bills, but continue to create and sell art in my free time. Perhaps 2018 will be the year when someone asks me what I do for a living and I can say, “I work for myself as an artist and sometimes I help companies with their sales/marketing.” Merry Christmas to you and your family. Thank you for all your enlightening encouragement.
Yes, this is difficult. The ones that get me are when a gallery owner or a curator criticize my art, because I’m under the impression that they know what they’re talking about. I’ve been told that my art is decorative, meaningless, irrelevant, uninteresting and the materials aren’t good enough. Sometimes these comments have thrown me off course, and I’ve spent years off on tangents that weren’t really me or my art. Now I’ve been doing this for so long that I don’t really care anymore. Despite what the critics say, people like and buy my art, and that’s all that’s necessary.
I have a friend who lives in Brooklyn. She wanted badly to show in Chelsea so she took her portfolio to a gallery there. The person just looked at her and said, “We don’t take this narrative shit.” She was crushed. For 10 years she just kept working and doing her thing, but didn’t have the courage to try again. Finally she did try at another gallery, can’t remember (something like Candy Machine??), and they loved her and her work. She was so happy that she had at last found “her tribe.” She now shows in LA and NYC and other places. Lori Nelson is her name. She was the University of Utah Art Department’s Distinguished Alumna this year. Anyway, there was no reason for that gallery person to belittle my friend that way. No excuse. I’m sorry you went through that. And good for you that you kept on working.
One of the best things about making art is that it teaches you who you are as a person. It’s a journey with highs and lows. I try not to identify too much with people’s response to it….either by their comments or their purchases. Instead, focus on the satisfaction of creating and producing an end result that makes me happy. This approach has brought me farther than I ever thought I would get when I started on this artistic path.
Honestly, the hardest thing for me is to clean my house and keep it that way.
And, yes, it is hard to put myself out there with my work. When I was first starting to paint in earnest, I was showing my paintings to my mother. She could paint so well, but only copying. She could copy a Matisse or a Picasso or just about any of the masters and do it beautifully. She always signed her name and would put something to indicate it was after a certain artist
Anyway, when she saw my paintings she said, “Marti, you’re such a good writer.“ In other words, why are you wasting time doing this when you can write. I laughed it off at the time, but it did sting quite a bit. Funny, now it’s a fond memory.
I do have the comfort of knowing she liked some of my work before she died. She was a funny, quirky woman, and I miss her every day.
Beautifully Said Nicholas! I’ve always believed that art chooses us, not we choose art. I love it when someone loves my paintings, but I create art to share my inner world, so if someone doesn’t appreciate my work, I know someone out there will. That old adage “you can’t please everyone,” keeps me going. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, I think the nicest people in the world are artists, so feel very lucky to be part of this tribe of people :))
powerful article, Nicholas. So pertinent to every area of putting ourselves out there. I know I encounter this all the time as I stretch outside of whatever comfort zone I am in. Stretching out of my c zone always feels good in retrospect -but gosh the turbulence can be HORRIBLE!!! Grateful to for the honest conversation here!
At my first solo show, someone wrote ‘Emperors new clothes’ in the book of comments. I was devastated. I still can’t bear thinking that someone thought my work was/is phony and superficial. I can’t remember any of the nice comments and that comment eats away at my self-confidence, so it’s a huge effort to make any art at all.
Liz, I can relate. When I was in college a well known visiting artist gave a critique for my painting class. He was quite critical of my work. Even though fellow students tried to soften the criticism, I just remember his comments. But with time I let it go and I hope you can too. You can make any kind of art you want and that’s good!
Thank you for bothering to reply, Joan. That nasty comment doesn’t stop me making art, but it hangs in the air when I’m in the studio and I have to make a conscious effort to overcome it. I hope I’ll eventually let it go. I greatly appreciate your encouragement.
I’ve been there, receiving the crushing words, more than I care to admit or remember. It is funny how the human brain retains negative comments much more easily than positive ones. But now, after so many years of finding my “voice” I know that painting is first and foremost only for my own satisfaction. Yes, I sell some work, have a few “collectors”, but I have realized that the more I put of myself, the more I trust in my self and my instincts, the more connected I feel to each and every painting. That is the satisfaction I receive from my work. I’m grateful for this blog because it is a nice reminder to me of how far I have come and what is important.
Although I had always loved art I had only dabbled in it occasionally before I retired. Early on in my retirement my friend and I both started painting. Her husband showed no interest whatsoever in WHAT she painted. His only interest was that she should sell her work. I felt really badly for her.
Eventually I evolved into a mixed media artist and co-founded a mixed media group in my hometown. Immediately I became aware of how almost everyone who joined was interested in selling, which made me realise that I was NOT.
I would display my art at group art fairs and was horrified at how people could just walk by my display and not even look at it or me. It didn’t take me long to realise that that was not for me. I soon decided that I would place my work where someone else would take care of selling it.
It took many years before I was able to call myself an artist. Once, in my sister’s presence, I actually got up the courage to tell someone that I was an artist. Later she made fun of me for saying that.
My sister is not an artist. However she often felt qualified to tell me what other people would like.
I’ve gradually evolved into a photographer. Yes. “I AM a photographer”. I have just completed a street photography course with a very experienced instructor who has been earning a living as a photographer for 40 years. He could tell me anything about my work and I would always remain completely open to what he had to say. I considered it a privilege to be able to share my excitement about photography with such a person.
And I have been posting/sharing my work on Facebook and Instagram where it is being well received. My daughter can’t believe I would have the courage to put myself out there like that. I guess, with time, I have become more confident in what I’m doing.
It’s been quite a long and gradual process. I actually recently had one of my photos printed as a gift for a friend of mine. Once I get the hang of that side of things I know I will be more open to selling my work to some of the people who have been asking me for prints. But that’s not at all why I do this work. I simply can’t NOT do it.
RIGHT ON this is so spot on thank you! no matter how much you know this it is still so awesome to be reminded. Your words need to take that space in our brain. Thanks again.
Ironic timing to read this. Today we were running holiday errands around town. While in a “big box” arts & craft store, I overheard two 30-somethings discussing art prints. One said “Look at this garbage. All you have to do is pick some colors and swipe them on a canvas”. I could have taken the opportunity to enlighten them that there was a time I didn’t *get abstract art, even in college. Many years later it has clicked for me. Now I love it! It holds so much emotion in the mark makings, layers, textures or smooth, oils, acrylics, pastels or a pencil. It is an expression from the soul of the creator. Instead, I practiced self discipline to keep my mouth shut. Art doesn’t come as easy to me as it once did. But I keep creating until the canvas tells me what I was trying to convey. I am an introvert, low self esteem and confidence. But…when it comes to talking art, I think we all hold a voice just as important as the next artist. Whether you are just beginning your artful journey or have created since a young child, abstract to photo realism to sculpture or photography, it all has stories to tell. Creating art grabs your heart. If people don’t get it, it’s kind of sad for them. How lucky are those that can make a career from it! I’ve always been an artist, always will. Sometimes it comes through so clearly. Lately, it’s been tough but it still shows up. Don’t let someone put down your work. It’s a part of you and we all matter.
Thanks Nicolas for your good thoughts.
One area of disagreement. You write…
“Over time I was able to slowly build up the self-confidence to put my art out into the world. And of course your art is actually you. That is why it`s so scary.”
Oh boy. Are we really our art? I know it can feel that way (and that feeling can leave us vulnerable) but I don`t think it`s really true. In fact, I think it`s vital for artists to understand that they are not their art. Art comes through an artist like light comes through a prism. An artist can focus the light and make it possible for somebody else to see something they otherwise never could of seen. But the light itself? That`s something mysterious that can never fully be grasped, not even by the artist herself. It`s a gift from the muse.
This insight, that we are not our art, is important because it frees us. It`s liberating to realize that you can make bad art and not be a bad person — and humbling to realize that you can make great art and not be a saint. Artists are just ordinary people that have put in the extraordinary work it takes to develop their craft. With great technique comes great expressive power. That`s amazing and wonderful. It`s also something we do, not who we are. When we know deep down that any and all criticism of our work, no matter how valid, has absolutely no bearing on our worth as people, then and only then will we feel safe to create.
Here is my tribe. How wonderful to be connected with you. Every word resonates in me because my experience is the same. I am connected with that stream.